and I have no idea what I'm doing.
I went from one committed relationship directly into another with an old friend from highschool, with no real "courtship" period. I just left one bad situation and fell into what seemed like a safe, comfortable spot. He turned out to be, well, not who I thought he was. So, after bouncing Bachelor #2 out the door, I find myself completely on my own for the first time in years. While I'm enjoying my new independence, (only buying what I want at the grocery, not sitting through another gawd-awful episode of American Idol, no mandatory visits to his mother's, etc) it gets a little boring (lonely).
How does a single gal, over forty, go about meeting men nowadays? I can't see myself meeting guys at a bar (scary) or at work (most of the men I work with are gay). I posted my profile on one of those popular matchmaking sites, but their recommendations were a little, *ahem* off. I said I wanted someone local and they showed me people on the other side of the country. I said I value intelligence, and I get recommendations of guys who could barely fill out their profile. Not to mention several conservative, right-wing christians! (I'm pretty sure I said I was a liberal pagan.) I've tried letting friends fix me up on blind dates in the past, which usually leaves me wondering what my friends must really think of me. (Were they mad at me??) Don't even get me started on Facebook. That's how I found myself with
My biggest problem is, and always has been, I just can't talk to guys. I talk to perfect strangers all day long as part of my job, but when it comes to men that I'm attracted to, forget it. Everything that comes out is a jumbled, rambling mess, if I can say anything at all. There has got to be an easier way!
